Saturday, January 9, 2016

Spice and Wolf: Goat cheese and apple porridge

Goat cheese and apple porridge

So, you're a travelling merchant, and you finally get a chance to have a nice meal with your harvest goddess friend. What better way than to sate your hunger than with a rich, sweet, nourishing porridge? 

I mean, if it's good enough for a wolf-goddess, it's good enough for me. And trust me when I say, this if Holo gets excited for this, so do I. 

So, let's punch that stereotype of porridge being boring and dull right in its smug face, and enjoy some awesome comfort food.

What you'll need: 

1 cup goat milk
1/2 cup quick oats
3 tbsp brown sugar
1/4 of a Macintosh apple
2 tbsp goat cheese, crumbled
Pinch of cinnamon
Pinch of salt

Step 1: Diced up the apple in small pieces. I prefer a very small dice, but you can keep them in slices, if you desire.

Step 2: Add milk to a small saucepan.

Step 3: Set to medium/low heat.

Step 4: Add oatmeal to milk, and let simmer for a couple minutes, until oatmeal just begins to cook. 

Step 5: Add apples, brown sugar, and cinnamon, and stir until combined, and continue to cook for another 5 minutes. 

Step 6: Serve with crumbled goat cheese on top, and garnish with more apple and brown sugar if desired. 

And it's as simple as that! A meal fit for a pagan deity.


Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Fallout 4 Quickie: The Dirty Wastelander

The Dirty Wastelander

While there are plenty of consumables in the Fallout universe, this is a first when it comes to mixed drinks (unless you call Nuka Cola Quantum a mixed drink. But instead of alcohol it's the goo inside glow sticks).

In any case, whether you're looking to relax and unwind in your settlement, or just want to get a boost on your strength and charisma - while sacrificing some intelligence and brain cells - this is the drink for you.

What you'll need: 

Mutfruit (Blackberries, for our purposes)
Whiskey, of your choice
Rocks glass
Ice, optional

Step 1: Empty blackberries into medium sized bowl, and use a soup spoon to crush said berries roughly.

Step 2: To keep it truly dirty (while also having washed your hands), grab those berries and squeeze 'em over a sieve or strainer to get the most juice without pulp.

Step 3: Grab your rocks glass (and add your ice, if you so choose).

Step 4: Pour in 1 and 1/2 oz of whiskey.

Step 5: Fill the rest of the way with cola.

Step 6: Add 1 tbsp of your mutfruit juice, gently stirring.

And there you have it! A cocktail known the wasteland over, enjoyed by raiders, gunners and minutemen alike. Drink responsibly, ya crazies. 

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Spirited Away: Steamed Tsubushian (red bean paste) Buns

Steamed Tsubushi-an (red bean paste) Buns

Somehow, Studio Ghibli is able to make food look so incredibly delicious, it's kind of unbelievable. And Spirited Away is a movie that stands out in its delectable illustrations. From the get go, we see Chihiro's parents gorge themselves on juicy, golden brown and delicious looking meats and pastries. Even if it DID turn them into literal pigs after, I would so risk it for a taste of that gorgeous feast.

In any case, these steamed red bean buns are a classic snack that are both stupid easy to make, and the perfect amount of sweetness. Take a big bite, Sen style. 

What you'll need:


- Red bean paste (recipe courtesy of - Click here for the recipe!)
- 1 1/2 cups milk, heated
- 1 packet active dry yeast
- 1 tsp sugar
- 1 1/2 cups self-raising flour (you may require more, add an 1/8 cup at a time until the dough is only slightly sticky)


Wax paper
Bamboo steamer
Large pot
Large mixing bowl

Step 1: Pour milk into a large mixing bowl, followed by the yeast and the sugar. 

Step 2: After the yeast has proofed and the mixture has thickened into a slurry, add the flour. 

Step 3: Knead dough until combined and is slightly sticky. Form into a ball, and let double in size in a warm place. 

Step 4: Once risen, roll the dough out into a cylinder.

Step 5: Cut the roll into six equal pieces.

Step 6: Press into a flat-ish disc with your hand, and place about two tablespoons of your red bean paste into the middle of the dough.

Step 7: Fold the dough into itself, making sure to encase the paste inside, and seal it in there by pinching the ball closed. 

Step 8: Cut some wax or parchment paper squares, roughly 3"x3".

Step 9: Place your balls (Heh, balls...) seam side down, onto the paper squares, and place the paper side down into your bamboo steamer.

Step 10: Steam the buns for 10-12 minutes on medium-high heat.

Step 11: Let cool and rest for 5 minutes before biting into this delicious, gooey, chewy treat.

Enjoy with your favourite Miyazaki film. 

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

The Pi Pie

Lazy Tuesday Recipe #2: The Pi Pie

Now, I know I'm a week and a half late with this, but...well, is there really an inappropriate time for pie? Especially Pi pie? Didn't think so. LET'S DO THIS. 

As you can tell from the title of this particular recipe, this is so easy that even a monkey with no knowledge of Pi and its infinitesimal decimal points could do it. So unless Bobo is reading from a laboratory computer, everyone reading this can make this delectable dessert.

What you'll need: 

- 1 can of your favourite pie filling (Hey. It's a lazy recipe.)
- 1 package of ready-to-bake pie crust (DON'T JUDGE ME. JUST DO IT.)
- 1 large pie plate (Disposable for easy clean up. See? Lazy Tuesday.)
- 1 Pi symbol stencil
- 1 paring knife
- 1 spatula

Step 1: Preheat your oven to 400°f. Roll out the first circle and line the pie plate, pushing it down gently to touch the edge of the bottom and the sides. Leave the excess to hang off the side for the moment.

Step 2: Empty your pie filling into the bowl of pie crust and even it out with a spatula.

Step 3: Roll out the second pie crust and place your Pi stencil in the center.

Step 4: Cut around the stencil with a paring knife. This is where using a store bought crust comes in handy, since it's relatively easy to mould.

Step 5: Delicately peel the crust off your counter and place it equally as delicately onto the top of your pie, and pinch together the bottom and top, peeling off the excess in the process. (Tip: use the edge of the pie plate as a guide and simply break off the excess along the edge.)

Step 6: Place your pie in the middle of your middle rack and bake for 40 minutes. Once the timer goes off, retrieve your mathematically delicious treat.

Step 7: Freakin' enjoy your easy peasy arithme-teasey pie.

Special thanks to my boyfriend for the stencil.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Adventure Time: Jake's Perfect Sandwich

Jake's Perfect Sandwich

Well, how about that? It really does glow...

I know what you're thinking, but you're wrong. It's NOT crappy Photoshop skills. It's magic. Pure, unadulterated magic.

What you'll need:


- 1 loaf of bread (I used calabrese)
- 2 eggs, hard boiled
- 1 beef steak
- 1 boneless, skinless chicken breast
- 6 slices of bacon
- 1 Roma tomato
- 6 sandwich-sliced pickles (I prefer dill)
- 1 sweet onion, sliced
- Cream cheese spread
- Dill weed
- Salt and pepper if desired
- Lobster soul optional (if it's in season. It wasn't where I live.)


Large saucepan
Cooking vessel
Bread knife
Paring knife
Frying pan
Baking sheet

Step 1: Get into the zone. [Not pictured. Use your imagination.]

Step 2: Get the saucepan on the stove, fill it with water and sous vide the steak by putting it in a plastic bag and sucking the excess air out. 

Step 3: Insert into the water and cook to your desired temperature. (Here's a handy webpage to help with that.)

After the meat is sous vide, place it in a frying pan with butter until there is a sear on both sides.

Step 4: Cut the loaf down the middle horizontally.

Step 5: Set your oven to broil, and place the loaf on a baking sheet on the highest rack of your oven for 1-2 minutes, or until the bread is nice and toasted.

Step 6: Cream cheese! Pickles for my boy Prismo, and some dill!

Step 7: Diced boiled eggs! Bird from the window!

Pictured below: how to catch a bird from your window.

To prepare the chicken breast, sprinkle on some salt and pepper and bake in an oven safe dish with a small amount of water at 375°f for 30 minutes.

Step 8: Common cucumber [not pictured. For, reasons.], sliced roma tomatoes, sweet yellow onions!

Step 9: [Salt, instead of tears] for salt, steak prepared sous vide.

Step 10: Bacoooooon!

Step 11: Eat the entire thing yourself. Or, if you're sane, split it with a friend. I, myself, have a lovely guinea pig boyfriend (hence the no pickles or onions on one side, because he's lame).


For the source to this random ass recipe, click here

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